I drink a lot of beer, this should be a secret to no one. Over the years I have learned many things about drinking beer and I would like to share my 2 most useful tips with you leading up to the drunkest day of the year.
Tip number one, bring a pen. St. Patrick’s day is a great day to flirt while you’re uninhibited and surrounded by people in a similar state so get some digits! You can also use your pen to give yourself a St. Patty’s tattoo. Make a mark on your arm for every drink you have. If you try really hard you arm will look like the prison cell wall of someone doing a dime for stealing cars.
Tip number two, forget the green food colouring, bring blue. Remember kindergarten? Blue and yellow make green! You use less because you’re making a colour instead of overpowering a colour. Most beer is yellow…ok? You may also notice that some a-hole businesses raise the price of green food colouring leading up to this glorious day. Buy blue and tell them to get stuffed.
You should really be drinking a stout though but I’ll let it slide, just this once.